Another Way
by 14faraday
Summary: My fix for the heartbreak that was "Thirteen". Lexa survives but Clarke still has to leave to deal with Pike, but there is always another threat lurking just around the corner.
1. Chapter 1

Writing is how I process. I get why Lexa died, I really do, the reveals and how it impacts the whole world all of that, intellectually I get it. But it hurts and I think they could have done it differently. Right now this is a one shot, but it has the potential to turn into something more. I hope you enjoy and it helps lessen the pain.

If I owned The 100 last night would have been so much fluff.

Clarke spared a second to wonder if her life would ever be her own again. The way Titus was shaking made her think that he did not really want to pull that trigger. The hard glint in his eyes told her he saw this as his best option. That made her think of Dante Wallace, and if he had similar thoughts before she ended his life. The bloodshed never ends.

"Think about this Titus, Lexa will know it was you."

"No, a skaikru weapon wielded by a skaikru thief will make more sense to her."

Murphy began pulling at his ropes again, when Titus' eyes flickered ever so briefly Clarke dropped down and frantically looked around the room. She could figure a way out of this, surely guards would come storming in once they heard gunshots. And she closed her eyes slowly, when she entered her room there had not been any guards posted, Titus must have sent them away.

"I'm leaving Titus, I am leaving with Octavia and now Murphy. Put the gun away and we can all walk away from this, you don't have to kill me."

She heard the pain in his voice when he called back, "So long as you live she will be Lexa, and she needs to be Heda. Your death might even push her into declaring war."

"And you don't think that another war is dangerous to her? You clearly have the numbers over Arkadia, but their weapons will do their fair share of damage, and Pike has proven to be ruthless." She moved her arm as slowly as possible under the mattress. "You are that confident that an all-out war is the safer option?"

"I am not going to change my mind Wanheda."

"I know," she jumped up and threw the knife Roan had given her. Titus jerked to the side, his reflexes too good for an attack like that. The sensitivity of the trigger and the recoil that comes with it however were new to him and he stumbled off balance. She tucked her head and ran for the door as quickly as she could, a few shots hitting the wall around her. She reached the door but it was already opening. Only one person would be coming that quickly and Clarke gave an anguished cry as instead of ripping it further open she slammed it closed. Not even a moment later a bullet struck the door and a hysterical laugh fell from Clarke's lips.

"Lexa! Titus has a gun!"

"Open the door Clarke!" Lexa's voice sounded so panicked it made Clarke's heart clench.

It made her sad she knew the sound of a gun falling to the ground. "I…I almost shot…forgive me spirits." Confident Titus was no longer a threat she opened the door. Well she started to turn the handle and then Lexa came barreling in with wide wild eyes. Her arms wrapped around Clarke and the blonde let herself melt just for a moment. They were both safe.

"Not that I'm not glad the shooting has stopped, but could someone please tell me what is happening?' Murphy drawled out.

Clarke followed Lexa's confused and hurt gaze take in the room, "I'd like to know that as well. Titus?" She said his name in _that_ voice, the authoritative Commander voice. Their arms still wrapped around each other Clarke could feel the brunette shaking but it did not creep into her words. "Speak true, Titus, for they may be your last. I killed Gustus for his attempt on the alliance, I am capable of doing so again."

Titus was kneeling on the floor next to the gun and Clarke could clearly make out tears in his eyes. She knew he did not intend to hurt Lexa and the close call had fractured his already fragile state of mind. "Heda, Lexa, I…after that attempt in the throne room today, all I could see is how dangerous Clarke is for you. You were turning your back on generations of laws and traditions, on all we have known and it started when you let the skai girl in."

"Your issues are with me then, not Clarke. I made those decisions not her, and I stand by them. History does not have to repeat itself. That's what brought the end of the world, is it not?"

"Actually it isn't, not the way you are probably thinking anyways."

Three sets of eyes turned to Murphy who only then seemed to realize he had spoken, "Err…like I tried to explain to baldy while he was torturing me, I was locked in this lighthouse for almost three months and well…the earth was destroyed by this AI who thought the problem with humanity was overpopulation. So she launched all the nukes."

Nobody spoke for a few minutes and Clarke finally separated from Lexa's hold. "I am going to have you repeat all of that later. Right now my brain just cannot take in that kind of information."

"Welcome to my life," the bloodied boy muttered.

"Why are you here?" Lexa asked.

Murphy jerked his head in the direction of Titus, "Baldy thought I would make a good scapegoat."

"Scapegoat?"

Clarke stepped close again, "Titus planned to blame my death on Murphy."

Lexa shook her head and moved to stand before her advisor, "So not only did you plan to kill Clarke, but you planned to keep it in the shadows like a _bushhada_."

"I did what I thought best, Heda."

"And for that you will die."

"Don't." Lexa turned to look at Clarke, confusion clearly written on her face. "With him clearing the floor we are the only ones who know what happened in here. It would do more damage than good for it to get out that he doubted your judgement so much he tried to assassinate me. While he has challenged you in private he rarely does it in public, most people don't know the extent to which he disagrees. You should keep it that way."

"That's if I killed him publicly," Lexa didn't miss a beat, "if you were to kill him, as is your right since yours was the life he attempted to take, excuses could be made."

"None that wouldn't end in more bloodshed. And it would hurt our ' _jus nou drein jus daun_ '. We act as if this never happened."

Lexa gave her head nod that could convey anything and everything, yet Clarke always knew exactly what was meant. "Never question my ability to separate my head from my heart again." Titus bowed lower. "Now leave and send someone in here to clean up the boy. I expect you to stay in your quarters the rest of the night, I will fetch you when I have something to say."

He moved quickly out of the room and gave Clarke a wide berth under Lexa's harsh glare. When the door closed Lexa moved to the window and Clarke finally gave Murphy her full attention. "You always find your way into bad situations, don't you?"

"That's one way of putting it. Do I get to be untied now?" She stepped forward and worked on the knots, "A lot has changed since we last saw each other."

"You have no idea."

"What's next? No offense to the Commander, but I have no desire to stay here."

Clarke's heart clenched tight at the reminder she shouldn't still be here. "We need to get back to Arkadia, and quickly. A boundary is being placed in a five-mile radius of it with kill orders for any skaikru on the wrong side as punishment for what the current chancellor has been doing."

"What is wrong with the goddamn chancellors? Jaha loses his mind and believes in a magic pill that takes away all pain and all his City of Light bullshit and now someone I am assuming is not your mother is being an idiot antagonizing the grounders."

"You will not make it to the boundary before it is too late." Clarke jumped at how close Lexa was again, a soft hand on her shoulder. "I will escort you both there personally."

"Lexa - "

"This is not up for debate Clarke. Only with me can I be sure you make it there safely."

"And what reason are you going to give to the other ambassadors?"

"Him. We say he stumbled into Polis and it is only right that you deal with him as he is one of your people, so I am extending your amnesty."

Clarke knew this was a time when Lexa would not budge so saved herself the energy. "Fine, but we should leave sooner rather than later."

"After he is looked at. And I must leave instructions for…I must leave instructions for while I am gone. I take it Octavia already left?"

"I would assume so. She is probably pissed at me right now, thinking I chose to stay."

Lexa swallowed hard but was saved from answering when a healer entered the room. He went straight to Murphy and began checking him over. Lexa moved her hand from Clarke's shoulder down to her hand and gave a slight tug. Clarke followed wordlessly down the hallway, back to the Commander's room. Clarke slammed another door shut, this time from the force of Lexa's body pressed into hers. Lips were devouring hers and it took all Clarke had to keep up. Lexa didn't seem to know what to do with her hands, one moment they were in blonde locks and then they were clenching desperately at hips.

"I can't lose you, Clarke."

Clarke tilted her head back so she could look into haunted green eyes, "You haven't. And I while I have to return to Arkadia, I will come back."

That seemed to trigger something in the Commander because the next kiss was slower, carried a weight to it that seemed so familiar to their kiss earlier that day. Only this time Lexa was the one leading Clarke to the bed, her body lying on top of the blonde's. The reverent kisses as clothes were shed stole Clarke's breath and in that moment she knew unequivocally that this was what she wanted out of life, what her more than surviving was. For the first time since landing on the ground she was thinking further than the crisis at hand. She was thinking past today, and that thought was Lexa.

"Ai hod yu in."

Lexa stopped her ministrations and her eyes held that wide wonder Clarke knew she would never tire of. "I love you too."


	2. Chapter 2

So yeah this is officially a multi-chapter story. At this point I am along for the ride as well as you. Thank you to everyone who read, reviewed, faved and followed, you helped justify my obsession with this idea. Again if you have any questions or comments please let me know. I hope this keeps your interest.

I do not own the 100

The ride to Arkadia had an awkward silence to it that Clarke was not used to while in Lexa's company. The first hour had been spent with Murphy filling them in on what he had been through since leaving camp. Detailing all he knew about the City of Light and the sacred symbol. Lexa had stayed quiet during all of his tale, and now an hour after she still had not broken her silence. Clarke took this to mean that Lexa knew things that she did not feel like sharing at the moment. She wanted to let it go, to let Lexa process this information and come to her when she was ready. But in a few more hours they would be saying goodbye for real.

"What are you thinking?' Clarke asked quietly, hoping that Murphy would be smart enough not to try and butt in to the conversation and knowing Lexa's guards wouldn't dream of it.

"It is a lot to take in. It…the symbol belonged to the First Commander. It is part of the Spirit of the Commander. The idea that it is a computer program…it is disturbing and confusing and goes against everything that I know."

"Yeah. I think we are still missing a lot of information, though."

Lexa shifted in the saddle and her eyes darted around them, "When a Nightblood is chosen to be Commander they accept the Spirit of the Commander. It is bound to us spiritually and physically. Here," she touched the back of her neck, looking so uncomfortable about the conversation Clarke wished she could reach out and hold her new lover.

"What do you mean physically?"

"The Spirit is inserted into the neck, it takes some time, but it merges and you feel this…I don't know how to explain it. It isn't voices in the traditional sense, but feelings I guess, that don't belong to you but are there with you. The feelings and guidance of the Commanders who came before."

Clarke wanted to make sense of it, but she felt she was still missing something and no sense confusing Lexa even more with half-assed theories. Instead she settled for comfort, "When I finish dealing with Pike I will come back to Polis and we will figure this out." Lexa swallowed hard and they entered another silence.

Two more hours went by and Clarke swore Lexa slowed her horse down. She understood the sentiment, she did not want to leave the other girl by any means, but she had to. Even with the slower pace they reached an encampment of soldiers soon thereafter. The men parted and bowed in respect to their Heda, but Clarke noticed they looked upon her and Murphy with barely disguised hate.

"Heda, the other skai girl passed through some hours ago. It was our understanding the kill order is already in effect," one of the generals said with forced politeness.

Lexa gave him her cool glare, "Which is why I am escorting these two, it was not their fault they were detained in Polis."

The general bowed his head, "Our messenger delivered the terms of the blockade and returned safely." He waited until his Heda gave a nod of acknowledgement before continuing. "The other skai girl waits just on the other side of the boundary, she is making the men nervous."

"I'm sure Octavia is just waiting for me, she is unaware of what happened," Clarke interjected in a soothing voice. She dismounted and walked the horse through the throng of men to a flag that had Octavia just on the other side. The younger girl's shoulders sagged in relief when their eyes met then tensed up again and her eyebrow quirked but she kept her mouth shut. "Yes that really is Murphy, I'll explain everything later." Octavia seemed to accept that and when Murphy quickly made his way to the other side of the flag she even gave the boy a brief hug. Clarke hesitated and turned to see Lexa inches away from her, eyes trying to look so strong but Clarke knew better.

She was surprised however when Lexa closed the distance and cupped her cheek affectionately, "May we meet again."

"That phrase is really starting to break my heart," Clarke gave a watery laugh. "I will come back to Polis."

Honestly if she had not been listening so intently she may have missed Lexa's next words, "If it takes too long I will come and get you."

"You know you can't do that Lexa, Pike will have his own kill order and you know it."

"A kill order that most likely includes you."

"Not if he is smart."

Lexa looked at her incredulously, and this time Octavia did not keep quiet, "I think he has shown he is not smart. Also what would be smart about sparing you? You're Wanheda."

"Not to Pike, not to most of Arkadia. To them I am Clarke who stopped the mountain from killing all of us. To them I am Abby's daughter and Pike does not want to give her any power back. Killing me would give her a lot of sympathy."

"I do not like your safety resting on him sharing your thoughts," Lexa told her honestly.

"Neither do I, but that's the way it is." It physically hurt, but Clarke stepped back, across the invisible line that she would fence her in for who knew how long. "Goodbye Lexa."

"Leida, hodnes." Octavia gave a slight gasp at the term of endearment and Clarke cursed Pike for the thousandth time. One last moment of eye contact and she turned around, signaling Octavia and Murphy to do the same.

"We need to find a safe place to start planning the best way to get Murphy into Arkadia."

"Me?"

"Octavia and I would be too risky."

"I thought Pike would be stupid to kill you?" Murphy challenged as they began to trek further into skaikru territory.

"But it would be smart for him to imprison me. Or at the very least keep me away from people so I can't rally anyone. No, I can't go into Arkadia just yet."

"If I get tortured again I'm going to be pissed." Despite the indifferent tone Clarke knew he was both teasing and serious.

"I really do want to know how this all happened, but I have my own surprise. This way," Octavia quickened her pace and led them through a winding path that ended at a cave. Clarke looked around, wondering what the surprise would be and if she would like it. Indra stepping out of the shadows was not even close to what she thought a possibility.

"So you did leave Polis." Blunt as always, Clarke found it refreshing after the day she has had.

"We got a little held up, Titus has had Murphy imprisoned for a little while now and decided that he would frame him for my murder. Why are you here?"

"Jus drein jus daun."

"I should have guessed. This works well though, it will take them a while to notice you are missing and they would not assume you were here." Her mind started trying to sift through scenarios and resources.

"I'm glad I have your approval," the general sneered.

Clarke stepped up into the older woman's space and held her gaze with a hard one of her own, "So long as you understand we cannot just go in and kill Pike. If he gets turned into a martyr someone will just take his place, we need the people of Arkadia to overthrow him."

Indra worked her jaw, Clarke knew this was not what the warrior had in mind when she followed Octavia. But Octavia asked her to come back to lead, this was her show to run. Finally, Indra gave a curt nod, "Sha, Wanheda."

"And how do you expect us to do that?" Leave it to Octavia to challenge her after getting the veteran warrior to submit.

"I'm working on that. I need to know who all we have on the inside and everything that has happened that you know of. It isn't fun, but recon is how this starts."

Lexa entered her room with great reluctance. She wondered if the bittersweet ache in her chest would hit her every time she entered until Clarke came home. She chose not to dwell on her considering Polis Clarke's home. Instead she sat on the floor in front of her bed and tried to enter her meditative state. Once there she would be able to take in all that she learned in the past twenty-four hours and organize it, to find the truth in the information. It was hard, much harder than normal, and just as she was feeling her consciousness start to slip a knock at her door jarred her back to the present.

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"Enter."

She was surprised when it was Aden's blonde head that came through the door. "Heda," he bowed slightly and hovered near the entrance.

She motioned for him to come in further and it made him smile. He sat next to her, mirroring her position and she waited for him to speak. "I've been thinking about what happened today. About skaikru and your orders."

"And do you have thoughts on it?"

He jerked his head side to side then up and down, "It is not my place to - "

"You could be chosen next, it is your place to speak true," she told him with a kind smile. "So long as you listen to what I have to say."

"Why the blockade? Why don't you send in the army to put an end to them?"

"The same reason I killed Nia and not Roan, it is important to keep in mind who your enemy actually is. The blockade keeps us safer from further actions by those currently in charge, but they will not always be in charge. Clarke will see to that."

"Wanheda can really do that?"

Lexa fought back a smile, "She can. She is smart and once her people remember why they followed her three months ago they will again."

"Titus does not agree with you, and you taught us to always listen to his council."

This time Lexa bristled and cursed for the first time how observant her favorite pupil was. "Listening to advice and taking it are different. It is important to hear different opinions and views, it helps you make a good decision, but it does not mean your advisors are always right. Titus will learn the error of his ways."

Aden went quiet and he started to shift back and forth, after a couple of minutes Lexa broke the silence, "Speak, Aden."

He did not make eye contact as he spoke, "You seem sad, Heda."

"Sad?"

His head bobbed up and down, "Because Wanheda left."

This boy. "I suppose I am."

"I thought…I thought love was weakness?"

Lexa really could not believe she was having this conversation. "It took me a long time to learn that love is not necessarily weakness. Love can give you a reason to fight."

"I see." She could tell he did not, but did not want to disappoint her.

"I hope one day you do."

"So what will you do now?"

"Now I have a mystery to solve, good night Aden."

He took his dismissal with grace and left the room with a bow and a, "Heda." She bit her lip and took a deep breath and prepared to try and enter her mind space once more.

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The following morning Octavia and Indra made their way to the secret entrance into Arkadia. The current plan was to get Octavia in contact with Miller, Kane or Abby so they could get their hands on another radio. If she did not return to Indra within an hour of entering they were to assume she had been discovered. Clarke and Murphy were watching the camp and taking notes. Clarke wanted to know how many guards they had and what kind of rotation of shifts they ran. How often groups left the safety of the walls, who left and why. It would be slow work, but she needed to know what she was up against.

"I see Jaha in there," Murphy lowered his spyglass. "That crazy fuck is speaking to a large group and they are nodding along dumbly. I bet they are all on those damned pills or whatever the hell they are."

"I understand that we will have to deal with that at some point, but it is not my priority right now. Honestly if it means fewer people who are following Pike I am not all that against it right now."

He put the spyglass back to his eye, "We'll deal with it later, famous last words."

"They haven't sent anyone out yet, that surprises me. You'd think he would want to check the strength of the blockade right away. If he thinks they are going to let their guard down, he is a fool. That army is praying someone crosses the boundary."

"Maybe he has decided to behave."

"No, him and his men executed the wounded and were willing to wipe out a village of elders and children. He is going to use the coalition army's presence to try and rally stronger support."

A few minutes of silence before Murphy's smug tone interrupted her tracking her mother walk across the grounds. "So, you and the Commander, huh? Is that something I missed when I decided to follow the crackpot or is it a more recent development."

"I am not having this conversation," she made her tone hard, giving him no room to argue. "Octavia and Indra should be getting back to the cave soon, we should head back as well."

The two warriors were in fact back when Clarke and Murphy reached the cave, and they were joined by Miller who wrapped Clarke in a brief but tight hug. "Missed you too Miller," Murphy drawled. He still did not get a hug.

"How are things in there?"

"Not good. Grounders that had come to us for medical help are being held in internment. Plus Lincoln after he started beating up a couple of the Farm Station assholes when it first started. Pike knows that Kane is undermining him so we have to be careful about how we communicate, but the bug I placed in Pike's office is still there. We've been getting intel from it, but no way to do anything about what we have learned. Right now their priority is finding land that they can use to grow corn and soybeans. Pike's whole stance right now is sustainability. Taking whatever we need, grounders be damned."

Clarke pinched the bridge of her nose, "My mother, Bellamy, Raven, Monty, Jasper?" She knew there were more inside Arkadia, but at one point in time she had been able to rely on those five.

Miller blanched a little, "Your mother is fine. I've been helping her get medicine to the grounders. Besides that, she has mostly stepped aside from the politics of Pike and is focusing on Jaha and his City of Light. I don't know the details but she confiscated his pills after some confrontation or another. Raven took one. Jasper is a mess and probably should take one. He's stopped drinking at least, and doesn't seem to have a death wish anymore." Clarke took a deep breath; she knew she knew she had more than a hand in that pain. "Monty is in the room with Pike, I think just because his mother is in there. He definitely has his reservations. Once he knows you are back his loyalty will switch.

"And Bellamy, he is Pike's right hand man. Kane thinks that if we can somehow get him back on our side most of the support for Pike will fall."

"My brother is too far gone. He deserves what's coming to him." Octavia's voice didn't break, and that made her words so much worse.

"Besides Kane, my mother, Bellamy and Jaha, who holds big sway with the people?"

"You," was his immediate reply.

Clarke paced a little. She came back to orchestrate a coup, but they didn't have an easy way like the grounders. She couldn't just walk in and challenge Pike into a battle to the death. They had to sway public opinion. "Does everyone know what happened with the 300 and the village?"

"No."

"Murphy, I know what I want you to do when you go back."

"I'm definitely getting tortured," he said with a grimace. "They won't believe me."

"If you stood up in the middle of the dining hall and made a big announcement, no they wouldn't. So instead you are going to whisper quietly over drinks, drop little bits and pieces here and there. Just get them thinking. And eavesdrop like I know you are so good at."

"What do you want me to tell Jaha, last time I saw him I'd tried to steal then drown his AI bitch."

"Tell him whatever you need to to get him to leave you alone."

That night Clarke was watching the camp again, this time with Indra for company, for some reason. Both were silent in their observations even when the front gate opened and a jeep came rolling out. The two got up and raced after it, which was not easy until they realized it was following the path to Ton DC. Clarke didn't think she would ever forget that route.

"They will hit the barricade before they reach Ton DC," Clarke observed.

"Maybe they are testing the boundaries," Indra offered as they moved through the trees.

The jeep kept going until giant felled trees blocked its path. Clarke and Indra crept as close as they dared and waited. A few minutes passed and then to Clarke's surprise Raven exited the vehicle, followed by Jaha and a few people she could not name. They began walking toward the fallen trees until an arrow struck the ground before them and torches went up, illuminating dozens of warriors. One grounder Clarke remembered but couldn't name stepped forward.

"If you cross the boundary line you will be killed."

"Death is not the end," came Jaha's immediate response and something about the way he said it sent a shiver down Clarke's spine. The words themselves were too similar to Lexa's for her comfort.

"It is for your body," the grounder responded, notching an arrow casually.

"We have nothing to do with this conflict. I was not even here when the slaughter happened. All we want is to continue our work of bringing people to the City of Light."

Clarke felt confident she saw the grounder roll his eyes, "The city of light is a myth, and the Commander's orders are absolute, any skaikru who crosses the barricade is to be killed. If that is the fate you want, please step forward, if not then I suggest you get back in your machine and return to your camp."

Clarke watched as Jaha turned his head to the side as if listening to someone, but no one spoke. After a few minutes he gave that quick smile she had seen so many times growing up, "I understand. We will head back, but remember, the City of Light is for all. Any of you who wish to learn more, to experience a world without pain, need only ask."

"Why does Jaha need to get past the barricade?"

Indra snorted, "Murphy was right, that man is crazy. This was a waste of time."

"That depends on how desperate his is to get past the barricade."


	3. Chapter 3

Hey look at that, I got a chapter completed! Sorry for the delay, I hope you like what comes next. As I said before I'm kinda along for the ride as well, rough outline but nothing more, so feel free to shoot me suggestions or theories. Bouncing ideas around helps me write faster.

 **Polis**

Lexa had spent the last three days avoiding Titus. An impressive feat considering he was in the throne room with her most of the day. Looking at him brought on an urge, bordering on desperate, to kick him off of her tower. Rationally she knew Clarke had make a good case for keeping her fleimkepa alive. She had every intention of following that plan. So she ignored Titus in the hopes she would not accidentally forget and decide to watch the life drain from his eyes.

What surprised her these past three days was that he had not tried to speak with her or sought her out once dismissed. They have had disagreements in the past, what to do after Costia had been particularly brutal, but he would always seek her out whether it was to continue the debate or give an apology. She wanted his absence to mean he was feeling guilty for what he attempted. She admitted to herself it would give her some pleasure if it was out of fear.

Questions had to be answered, so she stood outside his chamber door working her jaw back in forth to keep her anger under control. She ordered her guards to remain outside and entered without forewarning. "Titus," her voice was cold even to her own ears.

He stayed on the floor for a moment, at first she thought it was to finish his prayer. But then he got up slowly, tentatively. Titus had never been tentative in all the years she had known him; the image was jarring. "Heda."

"I have questions for you fleimkepa."

"Of course, Heda. What…" he seemed to be struggling for words, another unexpected sign of his discomfort, "what is troubling you?"

"Many things are troubling me, Titus," was her pointed response. "I've come to you because I was told some interesting things from the boy Murphy. You did not listen to him while administering your torture, but you will now. I want to see the room you held him in."

He bowed and made to move towards the door but paused after just a few steps, "I am sorry, Heda."

"You are not forgiven by me. You keep breathing because Clarke was right, but if you ever make an attempt on her again it will be the last thing you do, I don't care the consequences."

His eyes widened marginally before turning down again, but he nodded his head in understanding. He did not say another word while they made their way out of the tower and into a room she had heard of but never entered. The fleimkepa's were protectors of the Spirit, they had their own traditions that were only passed down from one fleimkepa to the next. This room was one of them, it was said to hold the secrets of the First Commander and few were allowed to enter. She had not even known where the room was, just that it existed. She took in the pictures on the walls and could not deny the scenes depicted felt familiar. The First Commander.

"What questions do you have?"  
"Murphy believes what he told me, that the world was ended by a computer program that could think for itself. That the symbol of this AI, as he calls it, is our sacred symbol. I met the former Chancellor Jaha while he was being held captive with Kane. He was not a man who advocated death is not the end. He was a man who was angry and desperate. Apparently that has changed because of a pill with our sacred symbol on it. I want to know how his story and mine intertwine."

"The boy does not know anything," Titus began but she cut him off with a hard glare. "Heda, he thought that the First Commander came from the sky like he did. That is not how it happened."

"He seemed convinced to me. That this Polaris," she struggled a little over the word, "was the thirteenth station which had to be destroyed to keep the others in line when their Ark was formed. That is not what concerns me right now as much as the Spirit being a piece of technology. And what relationship is there to the Commander and what is happening back in Arkadia and the City of Light.

"You are going to share with me all that you know. I do not care that it goes against tradition," she cut him off as soon as he opened his mouth, "this is how you start redeeming yourself. Consider this your blood payment."

He bowed his head in submission before looking around the room, looking for where to start. "You know only Nightbloods can become the Commander, only they are strong enough to host the Spirit. And even having the blood is not enough. Many fail to bond with the spirit and die even if they survive the official Conclave. Once the bonding has taken place it is absolute, only death can separate the two."

"And what of the first commander? How did this come to be?"

"After the end of the world what was left of the human race was not united at all. It was all any one could do to survive so it was everyone for themselves. A constant state of war of one against all. Then the First Commander rose up. She had no deformities, which at that time was rare for the radiation was still so great. She was able to unite the survivors because none were stronger than her, none were smarter. She rebuilt society. Because they had failed to do so on their own, she knew that they would need to follow her absolutely. Laws were created, and to disobey was to ask for death. She passed on the Nightblood. And she found the first fleimkepa. She passed on to him the secret of the Spirit, how it would find the next Commander and that because it was _her_ spirit it would carry on her legacy and rebuild humanity. Sometimes the spirit does not immediately find a suitable successor. There have been gaps between Commanders, and it was during one of those early on that led to the different clans being established."

She frowned at that, "There were gaps between Commanders?"

"Sha, Heda. In the early years there were very few Nightbloods, very few possible successors, and as I said before having the blood is not enough. For the past five Commanders there has been no gaps, always someone worthy to take the mantle. The First Commander knew gaps were a possibility, and had created a council to help control the ever expanding territory and people. That council turned into the clan leaders. The first King of Azgeda believed that if there was no commander as the most senior councilman leadership should fall to him. The leader of Trikru disagreed, and the clans became violently divided.

"It was the fourth commander, the first after a five-year gap, who established jus drein jus daun. It was his solution to deal with the warring clans. It forced everyone to think about their actions before taking them, knowing that blood would be demanded in return. He tried to unite the clans under one banner again, but individual clan leaders already held too much power to just take, so he settled for acting as arbiter, helping any clan that needed it. Like the First Commander he was smarter than the rest and saw the bigger picture. They say he communicated with the First regularly and did not make any decisions without meditating first."

"Meditating brings clarity and focus. I see all the pieces on the board but it does not put me directly in contact with previous commanders," she was not trying to argue with Titus, but literal communication with previous commanders was not something she had ever experienced. They may show her things, tug her towards thoughts and realizations, but actually told her what to do?

"Maybe they realize you need less guidance," he offered with a shrug.

"If that's the case I would think you would trust my judgement more."

"Have you heard of a Commander taking a life mate? Commander's do not love. I did not come up with love is weakness, your predecessors did. The third Commander had been in love before she was chosen, and then when the spirit bonded with her she distanced herself from that love, stating that it clouded reason and logic, which are essential to decision making."

Lexa shook her head, "What right do I have to make choices about life and death if I do not value life? What do I fight for if I love nothing?" He gave no answer other than a sad look. "What else of the spirit?"

"That is all there is, Heda."

"We're missing something," she was certain of it.

 **ARKADIA**

Murphy looked up at the gate with its guards and their guns trained on him with disdain, "Is somebody going to let me in or are we standing here all day?"

"Identify yourself!"

"John Murphy, one of the chosen hundred sent here to die," he watched one of the guards turn and say something he can't hear and wished they would hurry up and either open the gate or shoot him. Miraculously it was the former they decided upon. When the gate creaked open it was to reveal one Bellamy Blake. "Fuck.

"Are you going to punch me again? It would blend in with the other bruises but it'd also hurt like a bitch."

"The hell are you doing here Murphy?" was the gruff greeting.

"Still asking stupid questions I see." Bellamy did not look impressed so he sighed, "The blockade and kill order. Where the hell else was I supposed to go?"  
The older boy nodded his head but made to move to let the thief pass, "And I should let you in why?"  
"So you're Chancellor now?"  
"I don't trust you Murphy," and as if to emphasize his point Bellamy placed a hand on his gun.

Murphy was genuinely getting annoyed now and wanted to strike the arrogant look off of Bellamy's face, "You think I trust anyone inside these gates? It's this or get killed by grounders for something I had abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do with. I'll play nice until this blows over and then I'm gone again, I promise."

He watched Bellamy shift uneasily and hoped it was at the allusion to the massacre. "I'll let Pike decide if you can stay or not."

Murphy had to remind himself to play dumb, "Earth Studies Pike? He's Chancellor now?"

"He's the leader we needed. Now come on."

They walked through the camp and while he wanted to take in the changes since he left, he also wanted to avoid eye contact with Jaha if it was the last thing he did, "Fuck my life," he muttered.

"What was that?" Bellamy snapped.

"I said fuck my life," he replied loud and slow. "I didn't part with Jaha on the best terms. I was really hoping I wouldn't see his crazy ass again." He couldn't decide if it was easier or harder being able to tell mostly truths instead of lying completely.

"Yeah, he has completely lost it."

They shared a quick smile and Murphy remembered that once upon a time he was Bellamy's right hand man. A lot can change in a few months.

Murphy had been able to talk his way into staying, but a guard would be assigned to keep an eye on him for the time being. He turned to Miller with raised eyebrows, "So how did I luck into you as my shadow?"

Miller let out a chuckle, "Clarke told me where to be, when to be there and what to say when I got there. And here I am."

"I am starting to wonder if the Commander of Death actually is an appropriate title for her," he told his guard quietly.

"You're not alone in that."

"So what's next?"

"Clarke wants to get Jaha to actively challenge Pike, divide the camp."

"I'm not giving that guy more followers."

"She said we'll deal with Jaha later, one crisis at a time."

"I'm getting tortured."

 **OUTSIDE ARKADIA**

Octavia was prowling around like a caged animal and it was slowly driving Clarke insane, "Either sit down or get out, Octavia."

"I did not come here to wait around."

"We have been over this. It is too soon for you to return to Arkadia. You'll be imprisoned or worse, and killing Pike right now may solve the immediate problem only to create ten new ones."

"So we kill the whole council."

"And you think the majority that voted him into power will just sit by as the two people closest to the grounders kill their Chancellor? It will affirm all of his venomous words."

Octavia huffed and resumed pacing, "You need to think of something I can do then."

"Help me think of a way for Lincoln and the other grounders to escape. If we do it right Pike will look weak and get paranoid. If he starts turning his anger and frustration inwards people will start seeing him for the scared man he is."

Octavia snorted and rolled her eyes. A moment later she sat down with a serious expression, "It would need to be quiet then. A riot would be easy for Pike to know who is involved and risks the sick getting hurt."

Clarke opened her mouth but Indra stormed into the cave at that moment. It took one look to know something was wrong.

"Your brother killed two warriors in cold blood. I do not know what was said, but they did not have weapons drawn and they were a good distance away as well as alone."

Clarke felt her heart bottom out. Bellamy was seeking death and she would not try to stop it. She fought off thinking of the ways things would be different had she stayed after Mount Weather.

"He is no longer my brother." Octavia's voice was hollow. "We have to get Lincoln out."

"How many others are locked up with him?"

"Not many, under a dozen."

Clarke looked out the entrance of the cave, "I will draw Pike and some guns out of the camp, you will sneak in and free them. Straight rescue mission. Do not kill anyone unless you have to and be as quiet as possible. You saving the man you love should not further hurt views towards grounders. Pike will fear traitors in his midst and start acting rashly towards his own people."

She could see the idea of action sitting well with the young warrior, but a moment of thinking it over her brow furrowed, "How will you draw Pike out?"

"Me. When Miller returns with the radio we can start planning the logistics."

"And what do you expect me to do during all of this, I am not staying in this cave," Indra almost sounded like a petulant child and Clarke so badly wanted to smile at it.

"No, you will be making sure I don't get killed or captured."

 **ARKADIA**

"I cannot believe you are still alive," came a familiar voice. Monty. Perfect, Clarke wanted the boy back on the right side of things.

"What can I say, I either have the best luck or the worst," Murphy took in the boy close behind Monty, he looked vaguely familiar.

"What are you doing back here?" Monty sat down next to him and the boy with him touched Miller's arm affectionately before sitting down as well.

Murphy began to rub his jaw but winced from the pain, "It was that or keep getting the shit kicked out of me. Turns out the grounders aren't exactly thrilled people here decided to murder three hundred soldiers sent to protect Arkadia. When the blockade went up I was released by the Commander's orders, told I wasn't part of it so would be granted passage across the line."

"They weren't here to protect us," the boy who had been friendly with Miller replied hotly.

"And you are?"

"Bryan," the kid says a little forcefully.

Murphy takes a long drink from his water, "I wasn't here, but I did spend some time with the grounders, and they are pretty convinced that was the purpose of that army. And even if they were sent here for some sinister reason, you executed their wounded. And then you attacked a defenseless village. Puts you as the aggressors in my book."

"They killed I don't know how many of us when we first landed, and then they blew up another 47 in Mount Weather."

"You don't think we lost people when we first landed? Do you have any idea how hard it was to be the first ones down here? To have no idea what is going on and figuring out as you go along? You at least had some forewarning. You were sent down to live, we were sent down to die, so don't come to me with some sob story about how hard it has been for you. I got strung up by my neck, banished, captured, tortured, and given a disease to spread to the other hundred all before you landed. And trust me I hated them and believed they were the enemy for a while, but then I got some space from all the bullshit here and learned something. Not all grounders are the same just like not all skaikru are the same. Which I'm glad for, because I'd hate to be like you."

He had felt Miller tensing as his tirade went on, but his guard never intervened. Bryan kept looking angrier and angrier as the words came forth, but he too said nothing. When it was over he stood silently and walked away. Monty, on the other hand, remained where he was, eyes focused on the table.

"Did they really execute the wounded?"

"Saw the bodies myself on my way back here."

"What about Monroe? They killed her at that village with some sort of poison smoke," Monty asked desperately. Murphy got the impression the boy was terribly confused and torn about everything that has been happening the last few weeks.

"Sounds a lot like the bomb at the bridge that killed the grounders. They were coming for us so we set a trap."

"It does sound like that."

"Pike is going to get everyone killed." Monty didn't argue and for that Murphy was glad. He never had a problem with the quiet boy, and Clarke wanted him on their side so he did too. If half the people were as willing to listen as Monty they'd throw Pike on his ass in no time.


	4. Chapter 4

I have an idea where the big plot is going with this so hopefully updates will come more quickly. That or I will up and quit my job so I have a life outside of work again. Please let me know what you think.

 **Arkadia**

Bellamy was looking at Raven with concern. He has known her for a little while now. After everything they survived together it felt like forever. The girl standing before him was not Raven.

"I'll get the jeep working no problem," she smiled widely and he felt like cringing. He was really glad Abby took away Jaha's stash of magic chips.

"Thanks Raven. We should catch up, it's been a while."

That smile stayed put, "We should. I have so much to tell you about the City of Light."

"I'd rather just talk to my friend if that's ok with you."

The look she gave him was utterly confused, like she could not understand his request. Once the blockade was dealt with he would be the one having words with Jaha. This just was not normal. He wanted to continue the conversation but then the radio at his hip came to life.

"Bellamy!"

He quickly pulled it out, "What is it Harper?"

"Clarke's here. I just came across a camp and saw her running off."

"Repeat?"

"Clarke is inside the blockade."

He swallowed hard. This answered his question of whether she would be exempt from the blockade or not. "Get back to the rest of the group and return to camp. We'll deal with her only once we have a plan in place."

"Clarke?" Raven voiced.

He did not have time to deal with Raven if Clarke really was inside the blockade so he just turned and left. On his way out he grabbed Jasper, "Keep an eye on Raven will you? Something isn't right."

Jasper looked at the mechanic, "I will, but for her, not because you told me to."

"Whatever."

 **Outside Arkadia**

"I think he took the bait, he sounded a little freaked out to me," Harper smiled.

Clarke returned a slight smirk of her own, "He should be. You better meet up with the others, we need to keep selling that you are actually turning me in."

"Do you really think Pike will come out himself?"

"Yes. His ego is too big to just send someone in his place. He'll lead the hunting party."

"Don't die."

"Don't worry Harper, my fight isn't over." She watched Harper sprint away. Now the hard part started. The biggest obstacle was making sure she was alerted at the right time they were coming for her. She needed to stay just far enough ahead to lead them through the traps Indra had been busy setting but close enough they race after her and don't see the traps coming. Clarke massaged her calves and cursed the general. The past two days had been spent running a freaking obstacle course so she would know it by heart. Or that was the reasoning Indra gave her at least, she was convinced it was for the older woman's entertainment. Over and over she would run through the woods, jumping ducking and diving until Indra gave her version of approval; saying Clarke may not die.

She waited for what felt like forever. She could hear Lexa's voice telling her it will take as long as it takes and a small smile found its way onto her face. She had thrown those word back at Lexa while they journeyed to the blockade line. The brunette had been quick to repeat more of her own words 'mockery is not the product of a strong mind' but Clarke had clearly seen the pout on full lips. Clarke knew that rushing things with Pike could cause just as many problems as she resolved, but she wanted to get back to Polis so bad it hurt.

Her musings were interrupted by static on the radio, she had told Miller not to actually say anything over it. The static stopped and started two more times; they were taking the jeep. She took a deep breath and started to jog deeper into the woods, they would get here quickly in the vehicle and she needed to make sure to put distance between her and the 'camp'. After a little while she stopped and turned around, she could just make out the tent she had hastily thrown together. She crouched down behind a tree, Indra had been unable to see her from the camp so she felt confident Pike and his cronies would not be able to either.

Seven people approached her trap. She knew Harper would be there to lead the rest to the spot. Pike stood at the center, eyes darted around frantically, gun raised and finger twitched near the trigger. What caught her off guard was that both Bellamy and Monty's mother were there as well. Did Pike really take the next two in command with him? Either he was stupid or already paranoid and didn't trust surrounding himself with other people. The other four she recognized but couldn't name.

"Which way did you see her run off?" Pike demanded of Harper.

She looked around a little, as if to orient herself, and then pointed just a little off of where Clarke was hiding. Pike nodded his head and two of the men Clarke didn't know started forward. She counted their steps and on step twenty they disappeared from sight. The remaining guards raised their guns again and inched forward. Right as they looked into the pit Clarke started to make her way forward at a calm pace.

"Have you come to kill me Pike?" she called out, keeping her voice as nonchalant as possible. "That's a lot of guns for one person if that isn't your goal."

He spun to her, gun raised but she knew his line of sight was rather obstructed to just start shooting, "Not to kill you, just bring you in."

"After seeing what you did to the warriors sent to protect you I don't think I believe you," she had stopped moving. Instead she was trying to tense her body like Indra had instructed, so that she would be ready to run as soon as they took off after her without making to look like she was ready to run. She suspected she was not doing it right.

"Warriors who could have turned on us at any moment."

"You do hear your own logic right? Anyone could turn on you at any moment, are you going to start killing everyone inside Arkadia as well?"

He shook his head and took a cautious step forward, "How could you possibly understand, you're just a child."

She almost continued engaging him, she really wanted to get in his face and put him in his place, but that was not the plan. With every ounce of self-control she had she ignored his words, "You're going to have to catch me if you expect me to come with you."

"I was told you were stubborn," his voice was hard and she knew if he caught her it would be painful.

"You should remember that from class," was the last taunt before she turned and ran.

She heard curses and footsteps behind her but Indra had been adamant about not looking back. "It would slow you down and let them know you fear them catching you," so Clarke kept pumping her arms and focused on the next trap. She jumped at the last possible moment to clear the net under the leaves and afforded herself a smile a few moments later when she heard it close and fly up. It sounded like two got caught, hopefully one was Harper, she wanted the girl out of the chase as early as possible. None of the traps were deadly in and of themselves, but the longer this went on the more dangerous it would get. As has been life on the ground in general.

She was approaching the edge where the woods gave way to tall grass and she pushed herself to run that much faster. Indra was hiding just inside the tall grass, ready to take out anyone but Pike. She needed Pike to keep following her. She was slightly concerned as to what Indra would do to Bellamy, but trusted that she would keep to the no killing orders. Footsteps were getting closer but she was almost to the end. Gritting her teeth, she slid down into a ravine and scrambled to the other side and up, lighting a fire behind her from a torch sticking out of the ground. Her muscles screamed when she reached the top but she still had to hide behind a boulder before she could breathe easy.

"You planned all of this!" came the accusation while she massaged her shoulders and tried to even out her breathing.

"Well, I wanted to talk to you."

She could make out a snort over the cackling fire and dared to peak around the bolder. Pike was sweating and breathing heavily. His gun was lowered and his eyes were livid. "How could you side with the grounders?" he spat out the name like it pained him to say it.

"I side with my people, what is in their best interest. That is not you. You are going to get everyone killed. The only reason there isn't an army descending upon you instead of a blockade is that their Commander believes that all of Arkadia does not need to die for your sins."

He gave out a bark of laughter that sounded forced to her ears. "They don't attack because they are scared of us. We have the superior weapons, we could wipe them out if they came."

"So why were you so scared of those three hundred warriors?" she gave him a chance to answer, but no words came so she continued, "The full army is much larger than that. Those responsible for Mount Weather's destruction have been dealt with. The Ice Nation Queen was killed by the Commander. Your enemy is already dead," She peered over the boulder again to see Pike seething.

"I did not see their queen murder our children when we first landed, my enemy is not dead. And this is beyond that, we need to survive down here, to do that we need land. We need resources."

"We were, and still can be, part of the coalition. That will provide us with resources."

"I will not beg for scraps like a dog!"

"No, you'd rather act like an animal and lash out in hurt and anger. What has that accomplished you?"

"Like you haven't lashed out before," Bellamy's voice joined in.

She dared another look over and saw that he was limping over and holding his arm in obvious discomfort, "And I've learned from that mistake. If Arkadia keeps down this road it won't last. Sure, you may have enough bullets to fight off the army. But do you have enough to kill every single grounder? What happens in ten to fifteen years when a new generation comes of age only knowing hate for the people who fell from the sky and destroyed everything their parents knew? Stop only thinking one move ahead.

"You think you are so much better than the grounders, but tell me, what happened to those of us who were on the other side of the blockade? We were allowed through. You are keeping injured grounders as hostages and slaves."

"Enough!" Pike bellowed, gun back in his hand. "I came out here to bring you in, I did not want to kill you. Now though, now I have no choice. Next time I find you Clarke, it will be to put a bullet in you before you destroy us all."

Bellamy's head whipped over at that and Clarke saw him open his mouth but no words came out. She had no such problem, "Just keep in mind you threatened the Commander of Death." She took off after that, clicking off the radio.

 **Arkadia**

Miller turned to Monty and Bryan as he sat down the radio. "Clarke only wanted Monty to listen in, but I care about you and you need to know the truth as well."

Bryan worked his jaw back and forth, turmoil clear in his eyes, but said nothing. Monty cleared his throat, "What happened to my mom?"

Miller placed a comforting hand on the boy's arm, "None of the traps were designed to cause serious damage. Just make sure Clarke got her talk with Pike."

Finally Bryan found his voice, "And what, you expect me to just fall in line with Clarke? I don't know her. Pike kept us alive. I owe him my life."

"And I owe Clarke, a few times over. She kept us alive when we first landed, she knew something was wrong with Mt Weather, she escaped and managed to forge an alliance with the grounders to save us, she pulled the lever that got us out of there. And I am sure that she has something to do with the blockade not being an army to kill us."

Monty nodded his head once then looked up, "What does Clarke need me to do?"

 **Arkadia – earlier**

Octavia ran as fast as she could once she saw the jeep leave Arkadia. She did not know how much time she had to get Lincoln and the others out. What she did know was that this would most likely be her only chance. She tried not to think about being glad to see Murphy and his perpetually bored expression when she came out of the secret entrance. It took a moment but she realized his eyes were slightly unfocused. "Are you actually drunk?" she hissed.

He shrugged and pushed off of the wall, "Figured if I am actually drunk they may believe me when I say I was not involved in this, just you taking advantage of a situation."

"Just don't fuck up."

He moved past her and mumbled, "Like trying has ever stopped things from going wrong before."

They moved quickly down the halls, "I honestly did not believe Clarke when she said we wouldn't see too many guards."

"Bell and five others went with Pike. Miller is distracting his boy toy and Monty, Kane is acting shady on the other side of camp, and quite a few are on the wall scared to death of Clarke."

"I'm surprised he let people know Clarke was here, I assumed he would want to keep it quiet in case things don't go well."

"Oh, that was Harper and me, not Pike."

"Nice."

"It is what I am here for."

They got close to the cell block and Octavia's hand kept adjusting its grip on her sword. Murphy had his job as distraction, but getting everyone out fell on her. She moved her back against the wall as Abby and Sinclair came down the hall opposite them, they gave a quick thumbs-up that the coast was clear coming from their direction and Octavia let out a breath for something going right. One more round of everyone nodding their heads and Murphy made his grand entrance.

Octavia watched his stumble into the corridor and gripped her sword tightly. She could not quite make out what he said to the guards but she did hear the four hits to the wall. Four guards. A few moments past before she heard a guard yell at Murphy to 'fuck off'. He sure knew how to piss people off.

A few more words eh could not quite make out and then a sound she knew all too well followed. The sound of a fight. A body was hurled around the corner at her. She covered his mouth while kicking the back of his knee. Once he was at the better height she used the hilt of her sword to strike his temple. He was out before he hit the ground.

She grabbed the keys off his waist and looked up. Abby and Sinclair were still across the hall, but now they looked indecisive instead of confident. She held up her hand to tell them she had this, then gazed around the corner. Murphy had gotten a few hits in but was now on the ground covering his head as best he could. She crept past and unlocked the door as quietly as she could.

Lincoln stepped forward but she jerked her head towards Murphy and the remaining guards instead of embracing him like she wanted to. He gave a nod of his head and moved up behind one of the guards and placed the man in a choke hold. The other two turned, one of which right into Octavia's fist. The third she expected to reach for his stun baton, or even attack. He did neither. With a strangled moan, Murphy lunged forward and knocked the radio out of the final guard's hand. The guard followed the radio's path instead of watching her, so he did not see the knock-out blow.

Everyone looked around for a moment, taking stock that their plan was working. For the most part. "Murphy you're going to have to leave with us."

He looked up and squinted, the alcohol and adrenaline making his head swim, "Huh?"

"It was already going to be suspicious you being here when I broke them out, but with the way you dove for that radio they will know you were involved. If you stay here there is a real chance Pike will kill you. Monty and hopefully Bryan will be on our side now, we have to take losing you on the inside."

"Fuck. Goodbye warm bed."

 **Polis**

Lexa looked around her council and suppressed a sigh. Her ambassadors were arguing once again about the blockade. Apparently it should take less than a week for Wanheda to overthrow Chancellor Pike. Part of the council 'demanded' she march on Arkadia. Another said to give the blockade and Wanheda more time (she did not know if they advocated this because they believed it or out of fear of herself). Best she could tell the remaining couple of ambassadors were arguing against everything for the sake of arguing.

Titus said nothing, but he no longer hid from her. Their attempts to learn about the origins of the Flame were yet to yield results. The only positive was that it kept her busy enough to distract her from Clarke's absence. Somewhat. She too wished for Wanheda to eliminate Pike and his supporters, but she knew Clarke. Knew that she would not take unnecessary risks when it came to the wellbeing of her people. "It takes as long as it takes," she said to herself dryly.

"What was that, Heda?" Titus asked, garnering the attention of the ambassadors.

"The blockade remains, you are dismissed."

The men bowed their heads in deference before they began to file out. While they may not all agree with the edict of 'jus nou drein jus daun' they once again respected her power and authority as Heda.

She was ready to leave as well when someone entered the room, "King Roan, what brings you before me?"

He gave a full bow before coming closer. She did not know what to think of his smirk, she supposed he always had a smirk and reading into it would only further her headache. "Heda," he looked about the room quickly before continuing, "Word has travelled that you are interested in the history of the Flame."

She tensed ever so slightly at his words. She did not appreciate gossip, but it would be better than the alternative. "Word from spies, King Roan?"

"Of course not, Heda."

She wanted to believe him, "And this has brought you here?"

"The feud between Azgeda and Trikru goes back generations. Upon assuming the throne I have learned a few things. Including the existence of a book stolen from the fleimkepa when my mother's father was a child. I thought you might want it back."

With that he produced a black book from his breast pocket. Titus was somehow simultaneously frowning and buzzing with excitement. "You were not aware of this Titus?"

"I knew a book had been taken, but that it was of little importance."

"Thank you Roan."

He approached and handed the book to Titus. "I am just doing my part," were the words that passed his lips. 'Azgeda is loyal,' were their meaning.

Hours later Lexa set down the book and gazed into the candles that lit her room. It was similar to the others, handwritten by the first Commander. It was different as well. It did not say much about the Flame, but it detailed much about ALIE. She tried to end ALIE, and when she failed she forbade anyone getting near a 'lighthouse' across the water. The first Commander feared that if tech returned to the way it was ALIE would rain down more destruction.

"Titus you may enter!" she called. She had informed him she would read the book on her own. When he entered she handed the book over, "I need to leave for Arkadia as soon as possible, but we cannot let anyone know that is where I have gone."

He nearly dropped the book in shock, "Heda?"  
"ALIE is a more dangerous opponent than anything we have faced previously. We cannot allow it to come to power. The first Commander failed to destroy it, I will not."


	5. Chapter 5

Another chapter. More set up again, but I'm fairly happy with it. I have not watched the show since the episode with Niylah but have read recaps. Again the idea was to show you could tell the same story without killing of Lexa. So I am trying somewhat to follow. Please let me know what you think. And a big thank you to all that follow, favorite and review.

 **Polis**

"King Roan is here," Titus informed her. It was clear by his tone he did not approve of her plan. She did not care about his approval.

Roan entered the room like he always did, with a swagger and a smirk that should be disrespectful. She wondered if he had not been Nia's son if she would be bothered by it. She accepted that he acted the way he did because that is how he survived.

"Heda, I was about ready to leave for Azgeda."

His was of talking around questions should also bother her. "As far as everyone is to know, you will be leaving soon. You need to send your men ahead. You will tell them I am accompanying you and want privacy to discuss important matters."

Roan was silent for a moment but his eyes held hers. "Where are we actually going? Inside the blockade? For Wanheda?"

Lexa hid her smile. Roan was clever that was for sure. If he ever decided to follow in his mother's footsteps and turn against her he would prove to be problematic. "Yes we are going inside the blockade. You were the only excuse I could think of to explain my absence on short notice. It is not a perfect excuse but it will do.

"We are not going for Clarke. There is a threat other than Pike, a much more dangerous one."

"If we do not take care of the threat quickly my people will start to fear you killed me."

She thought about that, "You will tell them you are staying in Polis, that you will follow later. The Ambassador's will be told I am leaving for Azgeda."

"Why the secrecy if the threat is not Pike?"

"Because I cannot explain why I am going, and they will demand I take action against him if I am there. He must be stopped by _Skaikru_ , not my hand."

"When do we leave?"

 **Outside Arkadia**

Clarke looked at Octavia. She would follow the young warrior's lead on this. Miller had just relayed that Bellamy wanted to meet with his sister and herself at the dropship. There were good odds it would be a trap. It was a risk Clarke was willing to take, but she would not if Octavia did not want to.

"We have to go," came the stoic response.

Lincoln leaned forward with a hard look on his face, "Not alone. Indra and I will follow at a distance."

"No," Clarke shook her head firmly, "If we are going to go then it is going to just be the two of us."

"You are giving him what he wants," Lincoln pointed out.

Clarke did not disagree, but it did not matter, "We cannot risk all of us being captured or killed."

Lincoln opened his mouth again but Octavia cut him off, "She's right. Bellamy won't just try and kill us even if Pike is there. You and Indra he might. We can take care of ourselves. If it is a trap we get out of there. If it isn't then Bellamy had better be ready to answer some questions."

 **Outside Polis**

Lexa straightened further on her horse and urged him into a trot. She knew she should not appear eager or anxious but that was what she felt. She did not know what she was actually going to do once she got to Clarke, but she had to act. If she was being honest she was putting a lot of faith in the _Skaikru_ and their knowledge of _tek_. (Regardless of what she read she knew who and what she was, she did not know what ALIE was.) Faith in them could be misplaced, so she was anxious. She was eager to see Clarke.

"Once we are an hour past Polis we will change clothes. I do not want to be identified on our ride."

"Does that mean I get to call you Lexa while we travel?" her companion asked with a smile.

She looked at him and his smirk. The honest part of her wanted to respond with 'Only Clarke calls me Lexa' which was not exactly true but it felt that way. "If you find it necessary," was what she actually said in a rather cool voice.

"Well, you entrusted me to bring you Clarke, we have fought, you spared my life, killed my mother, named me king and now we are going on a secret mission. It is as close as the two of us will ever get to having a friend."

"Should I be concerned you are apparently all I can get for a friend?"

"Probably, only time will tell."

 **Dropship**

Clarke had felt a little smug when Octavia;s jaw dropped as she easily scaled a tree on the edge of the clearing. "I did survive for three months on my own," she called down. Octavia muttered something but she could not make out the words. She chose to feel even more smug.

The plan was simple. Get to the dropship as quickly as possible. They did not want to get caught in a trap. Clarke would keep an eye out from up high, and Octavia would have a good view of her brother's face. She had insisted she could tell by that alone if he kept his word. If it looked dangerous one or the other would blow on their acid fog horn and they would travel separately back to the cave. If it did not look dangerous Octavia would talk to her brother without revealing Clarke's presence as lookout.

Now they waited.

Bellamy came alone. Clarke was honestly surprised, but she was not relieved. Bellamy had done something unforgivable. A few unforgivable things. It would be easier if he stayed in the role of villain instead of showing glimpses of the caring brother or the man she thought he was becoming. Octavia made him wait and Clarke was glad he looked nervous. When Octavia finally made her way out she watched as the siblings held out their arms to embrace one another. And she watched as Octavia stopped short and landed a heavy blow to Bellamy's temple.

Clarke jumped to the ground and ran towards the Blakes. "Octavia, what the hell?"

Octavia looked up with a smug smile of her own and gave a shrug, "Change of plans. Now we have a prisoner."

"Did you think about the fact we have to carry him back to the cave?"

Octavia's face fell ever so slightly but her voice stayed confident, "We can handle it."

 **Inside the blockade**

They should be nearing their destination and Roan had proved to be a descent companion. He knew the land possibly better than she did. Time as a wanderer had its benefits, he had joked. Sneaking past the men on the blockade had not been easy, but between skill and knowledge they had succeeded. Now they were following what they hoped was the correct trail. It was harder to find than she had anticipated. She knew Clarke had learned things while surviving on her own, and Octavia had spent time learning from both Lincoln and Indra, but this was advanced counter measures. She was starting to get frustrated.

"Either Wanheda has learned some new tricks since I last tracked her or she has help," Roan commented with more than a little frustration in his voice as well.

"Perhaps they got Lincoln out," she offered up the most logical explanation she could.

More time passed before she tensed suddenly. Someone was in the woods with them. It took a moment or two longer before Roan noticed as well. If it was _Skaikru_ they could be in trouble. The _Maunon_ had possessed _tek_ that enabled them to see in the dark, she had to assume _Skaikru_ did as well. She slipped off her horse and pulled out a dagger, ears strained to try and pick up where exactly the sound was coming from and how many of them there were. She spun suddenly and placed her dagger to Indra's throat.

"Indra?" she felt a quick quirk to her lips, "Your presence explains much."

Indra's eyes looked hard in the moonlight. Indra's eyes always looked hard, but this time they held something different. Their relationship had changed.

"Heda, Clarke did not mention you would be coming," her eyes flicked over, "And with King Roan."

Lexa lowered her dagger, "It was not planned. A new threat has come to my attention."

Indra gave a nod but did not question what the new threat was, "I will take you to the camp. Clarke and Octavia should be back soon."

Lexa felt her heart thump hard in her chest, "Back?"

"Bellamy wanted to meet the at their old camp."

"And you let h…them go alone?"

Indra stopped walking and turned but it was Roan who responded, "You say that as if _you_ could control Wanheda." Indra did not turn back around quickly enough to hide her tight smile.

Lexa ignored him, "The last time she went to meet with Bellamy he put handcuffs on her and tried to take her to Pike."

"And Octavia got her back out. They are capable of staying alive. And Clarke insisted it was better to only risk the two of the being captured or killed than all of us."

Lexa still did not like it but she kept it to herself this time. She followed Indra and after a few minutes realized where they were going and the mistake she made in trying to find Clarke. So focused on following tracks she forgot to think about who she was trying to find. Clarke would want to be near enough to Arkadia spying on it would be easy. To be closer than Pike would expect her to be, to almost be hidden in plain sight.

When they reached their destination it was Lincoln who came out to greet them. She caught the brief slump of his shoulders and disappointment in his eyes. Then he straightened and threw his chest out, "Heda."

She reached out to clasp his arm, which seemed to surprised him, "I am glad you are free. Where are the others?"

"They were still in need of healers, so they left."

She despised Pike. She knew her own people had brutal practices, but those prisoners had been sick. They had been accepted into Arkadia in need of help then denied the chance to leave with the change in regime. "Clarke and Octavia?" she finally asked.

She knew the answer. He would have not looked at her the way he had if they were back. Still, she had to ask. She kept her face impassive when he said they had not returned, but then found herself scowling along with him when he continued. "I had hoped Indra was going against the plan and looking for them. They had been clear if this was a trap we were not to try and save them."

Lexa's stomach dropped, "Would Pike kill them immediately?"

"Yes," he said without hesitation. Whether to comfort himself or her she could not tell, but he added, "But Bellamy would not."

Lexa let out a breath and nodded her head, "They made the right decision, even if it is the hard one."

Grunts outside the cave pulled her thoughts away, and this time she pulled out her sword. She moved towards the entrance, Lincoln and Roan flanking her. A body fell at her feet. The body of Bellamy. She looked up to see Clarke and Octavia, sweaty and panting. "He's heavier than he looks," the younger girl said defensively.

Clarke had kept her eyes locked on Lexa's, head cocked and eyebrow raised, "I should be concerned you are here, shouldn't I?"

Lexa nodded once, trying not to give away she was drinking Clarke in. The blonde took a few more deep breaths, "One problem at a time. We need to get him inside and tied up before he wakes. Octavia hit him pretty hard but it took us quite a while to get back. He really is heavier than he looks."

"What happened?" Lincoln asked as he picked up the unconscious boy and slung him over a shoulder.

Octavia gave her lover a wide grin, "It wasn't a trap so I knocked him out."

They all turned to continue further into the cave and Clarke stepped close, "I know it can't be for a reason, but I am glad you are here."

Lexa could just make out the blue eyes in the firelight coming from inside the cave. Eyes she had been lost in since the first time she saw them. She always felt she was exactly where she was meant to be when she was lost in them. "I'm glad this is where I had to be."

When they got deeper in she saw the boy, Murphy, sitting before the fire. He looked up and she was surprised when he gave a quick bow of his head and said a soft, "Heda". She never got the impression he was particularly respectful. Clarke must have thought the same because she did a double-take. Lincoln and Roan chained up Bellamy and then all eyes were on her. She looked to Murphy and realized his presence might be a small blessing. He knew much about ALIE, he may not find her crazy.

This was not the kind of audience she was used to facing. Yes her ambassadors had tried to overthrow her, but they did so out of feeling a safety in numbers. None would have dared challenge her without the support of the others and most importantly Nia. That was not who stood before her now. Indra, a long time general and ally with whom she no longer was certain where she stood. Octavia, a young warrior with great promise but a lot of anger and fire. Lincoln, a gentle but dangerous warrior who was loyal to the death to his mate and people. Murphy, she did not know well, but he had the look of a survivor. And finally she stood before Clarke. Wanheda. Her equal in every way. She was not used to making her case before people so prone to arguing with her.

With no other option, she moved forward. "I have not come for Pike. I have spent my time since you left doing research on The Flame, the Commander's spirit, and the first Commander. With help from Roan I have learned much; some things I still do not fully understand. What I do know is ALIE is an even greater threat to all of us. I know that it is my responsibility to stop it."

She was not surprised that they all stared at her for a beat before anyone spoke. It was Murphy who broke the silence, "I know she is an evil bitch, but is she really that dangerous? When she destroyed the world before, well, she could. There are not computer networks connecting the entire world that she can hack and launch nukes from anymore."

"You said she is controlling people, I find that very dangerous. Even more so because we do not know for what purpose."

"So we are to ignore Pike. Again." Indra spat, "I came to see justice."

Lexa looked at her general and kept her voice firm, "I am not denying you that. It will just be delayed."

"How are you going to stop ALIE?"

Lexa hesitated. She did not know how to stop it. She knew she was going to need help. But she is Heda and such things cannot be said aloud. "I-"

"What Octavia meant, is what do you need us to do?" Clarke interjected. Lexa knew she should be concerned by how attuned the blonde was to her. She was not.

"I need to know what has been going on inside of Arkadia. I need to know who and how may have taken these chips. And Clarke, I need you to look over something with me tomorrow."

She was prepared to be asked again how she planned to stop ALIE, but was saved by the groans behind her. Bellamy was stirring. He clutched his head and blinked rapidly, "Octavia?" he croaked.

She stepped towards her brother and knelt before him, "Don't bother trying to talk your way out of this. When we are asking you questions is when you'll speak. Understand? Now you get to know what it feels like to be a prisoner."

He began to open his mouth then sharply shut it. He looked around and she saw his eyes widen when they landed on her. She chanced a glance at Clarke, she knew Bellamy meant a lot to Clarke. Remembered oh so vividly the conversation in her tent trying to understand just how much and in what way Clarke cared. Tonight Clarke's eyes held sadness.

"Indra," Lexa said calmly and jerked her head back towards the cave entrance. They walked in silence, and Lexa knew Indra would wait until Lexa broke it. So she did, "I spoke true in there. I am not going to pardon Pike for his crimes, but neither will I deal out the justice you are seeking. That must come from _Skaikru_. I spoke true that ALIE is a threat we cannot wait to grow into power before taking action."

Indra remained silent but Lexa knew she had the older woman's full attention, "I need your council and skill. I do not know the strength of my enemy and need those I trust around me."

"You trust Roan?"

Lexa felt a wry smile break across her face, "I trust him to not try and kill me. I trust him to not try and kill Clarke, which is more than I can say for Titus."

"He should have known better," was Indra's response. "I will help you, Heda."

"Thank you, Indra."

Her general gave a curt nod but said nothing further. She made her way back into the cave and Lexa turned to see Clarke coming out. "Can we talk?" It came out uncertain, something Lexa was not used to hearing from Clarke.

"Of course, Clarke."

Clarke came close, too close if she had been anyone else. No words were spoken and Lexa swore she was about to catch fire. The blonde stepped even closer, they were just barely touching which she found to be a new kind of agony. Breath ghosted across lips and the Commander knew she would not last much longer. Thankfully Clarke rested her hand on Lexa's cheek and drew her in for a kiss that was soft but nevertheless stole her breath away.

"I know we have to talk but I needed to do that."

Lexa swallowed hard and saw amusement dance in those blue eyes. She leaned in this time, whether to reclaim control or relinquish it completely she could not say. The second kiss did not end so quickly and Lexa found herself backing Clarke up against a nearby tree to more fully press their bodies together. She gripped Clarke's hips and deepened the kiss. Their tongues battled for dominance and Lexa could not care less when she lost. Clarke pressed her advantage and spun them, if Lexa had any breath left she would have lost it when he back made contact with the rough bark.

Their lips broke apart and Lexa felt Clarke panting into her ear. She needed to put distance between them before she lost all willpower. This time Clarke did not seem to share her thoughts and resisted when Lexa tried to create some space between them.

"Clarke," she did not recognize her own voice. It was too deep and husky and the word came out as a prayer.

To her relief, she tried to convince herself that was what she felt, Clarke relented and took a step back. "Right." Clarke's tongue darted out to wet her lips and Lexa had to bite hers to hold back a groan. "So ALIE is the bigger threat, huh?"

"Yes." Her voice sounded moderately more normal.

"Information I could have used before we started planning against Pike."

Lexa furrowed her brow, "Why?"

"Part of my plan has been to encourage Jaha to challenge Pike. He is a former Chancellor and those who have taken the City of Light chips don't see you and the coalition as a threat. It seemed like a good way to cut into Pike's supporters."

Lexa took in that information silently. Clarke had come to Arkadia without all the information, she could not be faulted for her logic. But she was certain that ALIE's power was tied to how many followers she had. "It is what it is. I will need you to look at the journal Roan brought me. It is from the First Commander, I understand some, but much of what she says is more _tek_ than I am familiar with."

"I will look at it, but I may only understand a little more than you. Raven, if she was not one of them, is who we want. Sinclair could probably help, maybe Wick or even my mother if it is biology. Regardless of who, someone else is going to need to escape Arkadia."

"Raven has joined them?" Lexa did not like that at all. She may not have dealt with the girl much but she knew how powerful a mind she possessed. How the mountain would not have fallen without her. She was not a person Lexa wanted as an enemy.

Clarke's eyes once again filled with sadness, "Raven suffered so much since landing, physically and emotionally. You can't blame her for wanting to stop the pain."

"I'm not," Lexa was quick to assure. "The desire to avoid pain is powerful. It is why it was so easy to believe love is weakness."

" _Was_ easy?" Clarke challenged with a soft smile.

Lexa looked at Clarke and willed her eyes to say the words her voice did not, " _Sha_."

Some of the sadness left Clarke's eyes and she stepped close again, causing Lexa's breath to quicken, "You should go back in and get some sleep."

"So should you."

"I should start keeping watch like I told the others I was going to."

Lexa reached for Clarke's hand, "I will stay with you."


	6. Chapter 6

Welcome back! I cannot bring myself to even watch the first six episodes of the season again so I apologize if my timeline seems a little off anywhere. Little Clexa in this chapters, the other players get their moment, so I hope what is there you enjoy. I'm having fun on the ride and I hope you are as well. Please let me know what you think.

 **Arkadia**

"I do not want to stay inside these walls much longer. The update is not here; we must start searching for Polaris." Despite the urgency she was trying to convey, ALIE's voice was as calm as ever. Her acolytes nodded along as she continued, "We cannot make it through the blockade, so we need it to end. That means ending Pike, one way or another."

Raven looked around the room. It felt so nice to be included, to be a part of something greater. This was where she was supposed to be. She wanted to help, she needed to help. ALIE did so much for her, it was only fair to return the favor. She knew what needed to be done, that Pike needed to die. He was a necessary sacrifice to be able to continue their quest. ALIE needed to find the update so whatever it took to accomplish that would be done.

Jackson spoke first and Raven nearly rolled her eyes, "If he joined us in the City of Light…"

Jaha shook his head, "It would be easiest for sure, but Pike is resistant to what we offer. Even if he were not, it still would not matter because Abby has hidden the machine. We will have to take power away from him. I can get a council instituted again, reclaim some form of democracy and use it to remove him from Chancellor."

"That could take months," Raven interjected with an earnest look on her face, "We have to kill him and take his body to the grounders."

"If we kill him we risk his followers not coming to us, to the City of Light," ALIE pointed out and Raven was so glad ALIE was there to help guide them.

She thought for a second, "Then we help Clarke and Octavia do it."

"That will do. In the meantime, we must find the machine. Abby only thinks she has hidden it well." ALIE ordered. She paused and cocked her head, "Something has happened. Pike is distraught and convening a meeting. It sounded like he is going to institute a lockdown of the entire camp."

Raven was not concerned, "Good thing that cannot touch the City of Light."

"Raven!" Abby called out. The girl in question was walking towards the mess hall, limp free. Abby hated that she wished that was not the case. The girl stopped and turned, ignoring the guards trying to usher her along again. When Abby heard that Pike was forcing everyone inside she knew she would finally be able to track down the mechanic. The girl had been avoiding her since joining the City of Light.

"Hi Abby, I was looking for you."

"Oh?" Abby had a feeling about what.

"I wanted to know if you have changed your mind about letting others choose the City of Light. Of allowing others relief from pain."

Abby scowled at the young mechanic, "No. I have not changed my mind. I do, however, have a few questions for you. Do you know what happened to Finn's ashes? I had kept a jar for Clarke and it is missing." She watched Raven closely all the while speaking, and as she feared no look of recognition at the mention of Finn.

"I…" the young woman frowned and look at a spot just past Abby. The doctor was getting used to this behavior from the infected (as she was referring to them internally). Finally, Raven continued but something in her face did not look quite as peaceful. "I did not take his ashes. I have no reason to."

"I wouldn't say that. As someone who loved him it is something I would understand."

Raven faltered again before straightening her back, "I did not take them."

"Okay then." Abby knew nothing more would come, but she hoped what was left of her friend, surrogate daughter even, would push back. She turned to leave and when one of the guards tried to stop her she leveled her best glare until he stepped back. She refused to be bullied by Pike, let alone his lap dogs.

 **Outside Arkadia**

Clarke put the journal down and rubbed her eyes. She supposed a few things made a bit more sense now so the headache was worth it, "So ALIE found a way to leave the lighthouse by creating these computer chips that could survive in a human host. Because she had destroyed everything in the nuclear fallout she had to create her own network to connect to. So all we have to do is figure out how to stop human computers."

Lexa stared at her with a blank expression.

Clarke took a moment to think more carefully, "Before the world ended it was all connected through computers. People from all over the world could talk, trade, share information, do anything really with each other. Because ALIE is a computer program she was able to invade the computers that had access to launching those missiles. But now none of that exists for her to connect to, so she learned how to connect to people."

"Did you find where it says how we can stop her?"

Clarke sighed, "Not that I could tell. We need more help."

Lexa nodded but said nothing. Instead she began to pace back and forth before Clarke. Clarke let her have a few minutes, but when the silence did not break she knew something was weighing down the Commander. So the blonde moved into the brunette's path and frowned when the other woman stopped with feet of space between them.

"Lexa, what's wrong?"

Green eyes bored into hers, "I am facing an enemy that is controlling people and I do not know how to defeat it. Is that not reason enough to be concerned?"

Clarke quirked a brow, "That may be true, but I know you. I know there is more to it than that."

Lexa gave a solemn nod but did not respond right away. When she did her voice was soft, a whisper, "Clarke…In the other journals I read…I think I have an ALIE chip."

The sky girl blinked a few times. It sounded completely ridiculous to her, but Lexa clearly seemed to believe this to be true. "Do you see ALIE? Murphy says they can see her."

Lexa swallowed hard, "No. I told you before that the Flame is inserted into the neck after a Nightblood is chosen." She crossed the distance and grabbed Clarke's hand, moved it to the back of her neck and Clarke felt her fingers trace a scar. She wondered briefly how she missed it. "The information your mother passed on says that this is where the chip goes. It is not a coincidence."

Lexa released her hand but Clarke used the freedom to run her finger tips up and down the tan neck, "It isn't the same."

"How can you be sure, Clarke?" Their eyes locked again and Clarke wondered not for the first time who the young Commander confided in since assuming power. She was sure it was supposed to be Titus, but she could not see that being the case. Her mind drifted to Gustus. It could have been him, he had clearly loved Lexa and she him. Another victim to the war between _Trikru_ and _Skaikru_. There had of course been Costia, but from what she understood that had been very early into Lexa's reign. Clarke knew what it meant for Lexa to open up to her. To trust her with vulnerabilities.  
The blonde drew closer holding eye contact, "Because you are your own person, I've seen that. No one and nothing controls you." Clarke let her voice drop to a whisper, "And I wouldn't feel this way if you were some computer program."

Lexa brushed her nose against Clarke's, her voice now sly, "How do you feel?"

The response was a kiss.

"Gross."

Clarke pulled back and glared at Octavia, "Like I haven't watched you and Lincoln?"

Octavia rolled her eyes and continued walking out into the midday light. "I came out to tell you Miller gave the signal something is going down inside Arkadia. My guess is Pike freaking out over Bellamy."

"Damnit. If they all have to go radio silent we are going to have problems. We need to get eyes on camp."

"Already told Murphy to get going, Lincoln offered to go with him."

Lexa took a full step back, "Good work. You should also prepare to enter the camp. What do you think Pike will do?"

"Overreact. That's what I have been trying to get him to realize he was doing, as well as try and push him into continuing to do so."

 **Inside Arkadia**

Pike was pacing around restlessly, something that made Monty quite nervous. He was one of a dozen people Pike's office, including his mother. It could not mean anything good.

"Bellamy is missing"

Monty held his breath and tried to look as confused as everyone else. "Missing?" Hannah asked, tone of voice implying she assumed worse.

"He left camp yesterday and has not returned. He did not tell me he was leaving, I pieced together when he left from witnesses. This means one of a few things. He left to try and bring his sister back in to save her and was captured by her and _Clarke_ ," her name came out as a curse, "was killed by the grounders or he defected."

Monty looked around the war room for a friendly face and found Bryan, alone. If Miller was not here then that meant Pike did not trust his friend. Things were not looking good, but then again this is what Clarke had been hoping would happen. The plan had been to get Pike to act so erratic the people of Arkadia turned on him.

Wanting to look committed to the madman, Monty asked his own question, "You don't think Clarke and Octavia would kill him?"

"No, but they might hand him over to the grounders, that is where their loyalties lie after all." The Chancellor sounded disgusted at the idea.

Monty struggled not to respond to that, to defend his friends, and settled on a curt nod.

"Do you really think he would defect?" his mother asked with concern. He wondered just how many terrible things his mother and Bellamy knew.

"I don't know." Pike slammed his hands on the table, "I don't know! We have to assume that's what happened, that he is spilling our secrets. This is why I ordered the lockdown and I am going to implement a curfew as well. I need everyone in camp accounted for. I've made up new rotation schedules for the guards, you are to memorize only, no hard copies. No one is to leave camp for a few days. Those under suspicion of treason are to be confined to their rooms. I'm sorry Bryan, but that means your boyfriend. Hannah, I'm going to need your help keeping Kane and Abby in check."

"What about Jaha?"

Pike rubbed the top of his head and let out a tired sigh, "Confine him as well. I don't think he has anything to do with this but he is too much of a wild card. Only guards are allowed to be out at night, and I want names and specific locations for all of them."

"How long are you going to enforce the curfew?" one of the farm station guards asked. Monty was glad he sounded unsure about all of this.

"As long as it takes for me to figure out what happened to Bellamy."

"How are you going to do that without leaving the camp?" the same guard pressed.

Pike got into the man's face, "I'm working on that. Dismissed."

An hour later Pike left his office. He went over everything he knew over and over again until he couldn't see straight. Bellamy would not betray him, that he felt certain. But he also knew Bellamy loved his little sister and do whatever it took to keep her safe. His best guess was that his trust in her lead to his capture. Stupid kid.

The halls were empty; he had been very clear that tonight everyone was to be accounted for. Those that had specific locations to be for their jobs could remain where they were, with supervision. The remainder would be split into different groups so the guards could watch them. He knew he had spies in his midst, that there were traitors giving Clarke information on his movements. That needed to end now. If she lost her eyes inside of Arkadia she would have to move into the open, and then he could kill her.

He didn't understand her. He didn't understand how a child could hold so much power. At first he had laughed it off, that the people from the Ark had just been so disorganized of course a strong willed child could take control. Now he knew better. She was a threat to all he was trying to achieve. She betrayed them to the ground. He could no longer afford to let her live.

His thoughts followed him into the courtyard, as they had started to call it, and to a man he no longer knew, "I know you are a former Chancellor, but the rules apply to you as well. You should be in the mess hall."

Jaha looked up, smile in place, "Of course, my apologies. It is just so beautiful out tonight, I needed one last look." He stood. "Man without help and guidance only knows conflict."

"I'm not taking one of your damn pills," Pike snapped.

"You will in time. The fear of loss is powerful. People will resort to desperate measures to prevent losing the things they love."

"Is that a threat?"

"Advice."

"Did Abby tell you to keep an eye on me?"

Jasper shook his head as he entered her workshop, "She'd probably kill me if she knew."

Raven cocked her head, "Why?"

He shuffled a little uncomfortably but when he spoke he made eye contact and willed her to understand his full question, "What's it like?"

"It's peace. All of the pain is gone. It's freedom."

"So thinking about Finn doesn't hurt anymore? I know I wasn't here for his death, but I've heard. And I may have also stolen his ashes. I'm sorry about that. I just…Maya and Mt. Weather and Clarke just running away like she did." He ran his hand over his buzzed hair and closed his eyes tightly. "I'm tired. Tired of hurting."

As he finished she approached and laid a hand on his shoulder, "If you help me, I can help you."

"How?"

"Abby has taken something from us. She has kept quite the secret; you can get her to reveal where it is. Once we have it again you will be able to join us."

His eyes were red. He no longer knew if it was from the tears or the alcohol anymore. He dared let a little hope back into them, "It will stop hurting? To live?"

"Yes."

She sounded so sure he felt a little more hope spark, "And it will just be the happy memories of Maya and me?"

Her smile faltered but he refused to acknowledge it, "Happy memories?"

"You know, like you have with Finn. First kisses, I love you's, what not. The stuff that makes you smile." Her body jerked back and he called himself a fool for having hope. "You don't remember."

She clutched her head, "Finn. Finn. I should remember him. Why won't you let me remember him? What have you done to me?" Her eyes seemed to be focused but he could not see what she saw.

Jasper reached out but she shrugged him off. "Jasper, you need to leave. Don't look for it. No! Look for it and destroy it, just make sure you don't tell anyone. You have no idea how many of us, of them, of her people there are here."

His head was spinning. He did not understand what was happening. "What about you?"

She stood up with a determined look on her face and he remembered how many times she got them out of a bad situation, "I'm going to find a way to get the bitch out of my head."

"Hello Abby."

Her skin crawled just from hearing his voice. She finished administering the shot before plastering a smile onto her face and turning to the intruder, "Chancellor. What can I help you with?"

"Your daughter is causing some problems."

"Well, she has never listened to me so I don't think I will be of much use," her tone was meant to be light but it may have come out a little smug.

"You're still her mother. That carries some power."

She had known this conversation would come the moment Pike took power. Knew that Clarke would oppose him and he would resort to this. But she would make him say it. "Cut to the chase, Pike. I have a lot of patients."

"Fewer than you used to. Tell me again that you had nothing to do with the grounders escape. That you don't know how Octavia comes and goes as she pleases." He demanded, taking aggressive steps forward as he spoke.

"She's a resourceful girl. And a product of what we turned her into. Locking her up for even existing. Sending her to Earth to die. We have proven to be more than capable of savagery."

"She really does take after you," he seemed to say to himself, "I am not going to be savage. I am offering her a trade. You for Bellamy Blake."

This time Abby really did smile, "You underestimate her. She pulled a lever that killed hundreds and destroyed her own soul. If Bellamy is more important to her plan to stop you she won't make the trade."

"Even if it is your life on the line?"

And there it was, the threat she knew he would eventually come to make. "Yes."


End file.
